im so disappointed with myself... haiz..

call myself a friend... zzz... im not worthy of that title like seriously...

i think im too concerned with myself... im just me living in MY world...

after today's session at LTF or rather during the LTF session, it struck me that... hey maybe i don't really know my friends that well at all... i was like... hey i thought i was your friend but i don't know all this at all...

zz... i think im like a failure or something... im like too preoccupied with the crap called school that i neglected alot of things... haiz... it really was a good time just to sit down there at the back of the room just reflecting on my past 2 months...

i occupied myself with school, which is just wierd, and neglected my family... i havent really talked to anyone like as in sit down and talk stuff... just maybe like hi and bye... really felt like it was some hotel or something.. like greeting the waiter or something... =.=... then i check into my room and sleep then next day out...

friends... i think i neglected the main bulk of my friends... like my christian friends... people who are like important in my life... i skipped lunch for a few weeks straight just to go home and study... wow... can win prize liao...

hardly actually talked to anyone on msn who are christians... rawr... and i didn't know my "bro" was in a bad patch until today... like i only hear... not there to help... i feel so useless and like a figure head... only got the status... nvr really do much ...

maybe all i can offer now is 1 word... SORRY...
I'M so FREAKING USELESS